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We got attacked." I said, "I'm volunteering." I said, "I'll take anything. She goes, "Gable, you don't know what it's like for boys coming back from Vietnam, how hard they had it and what they came back with." I said, "Mom, it's different, though. Gable Darbonne: My mom, I remember she was crying in the kitchen. It's, you don't, I will never get that back. Man, you it's everything, but you miss it. You miss everything about how hard it wanna, how bitter you got, how angry and emotional, the things you saw and you missed that camaraderie, that brotherhood, sense of purpose, the struggling with things. Real quick why are your hands going up so much? [Kevin Reeder: How many of you would go back to a deployed environment with your branch of service right now if that opportunity was available? Lotta hands up. They plow through a workbook that challenges their guilt with statements like, "I shot a woman in combat therefore I'm worthless" or "My friend was killed by the enemy-I'm responsible." Cognitive processing tries to put the war in the past and help them re-examine who they are today. They read that statement, about the trauma, to the group then they discuss how their lives are still held in the grip of war. And so what we do with CPT, Cognitive Processing Therapy, is they write an impact statement at the beginning of therapy to show them the impact of the trauma on their lives and on their beliefs. Kevin Reeder: After a trauma or multiple traumas, often a person can believe the world just is a dangerous place. They write about days like that in the other key therapy called cognitive processing. On his first tour, Apellido's patrol was ambushed. And then even another one happens and another one.
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I mean the first one, it hurts but you don't get really time to heal. He fought for a year in Afghanistan, spent one month at home, then went to Iraq, and later, Afghanistan again.Īnthony Apellido: The more deployments you get, the more time you spend out there - it just keeps stacking. Every time I get through it I get stronger and it helps every time."Īnthony Apellido: To lose one of your buddies in a firefight you don't want to see that, you don't want to feel that again and so when you get back to the rear you're pissed off because you don't want to get close to anybody anymore.Īnthony Apellido experienced those multiple tours we talked about. "It helps me to get past the guilt, survivor's guilt. Scott Pelley: And you weren't sure that was true before?Įric Collins: No, I didn't wanna be alive.